Tuesday, December 1, 2009

The Seasons of Friendship

I've recently come to a realization about how my passion drummer is going to change my life. It comes with mixed emotion. I've read before that there is a season for all things. And in that fashion, friends move in and out of your life as they are relevant to your world. I've never been one that is good at letting go. I've been feeling a bit melancholy and realized (eventually) it was because I was letting go. It wasn't really a conscious decision, but like the closing of a chapter, I am finding that some relationships are not as compatible with my new passion-is-king outlook on life as perhaps I'd like them to be. As I focus on my passions, being the very social person that I am, I've naturally found myself wanting to share my time with others with similar passions. Oddly, I've been presented with situations since my passion drummer epiphany where I've been made fun of for following my passions. In other cases, I've been excluded from participating in activities that are directly related to my passions by people in my life that have similar interests. Both perplexing and hurtful, these encounters have been the catalyst for me to make a change. I have decided that I want to be around people that are just as excited about sharing their passions with me as I am with them. In my old goal and status driven world, I was able to overlook the incompatibilities and the little pissing contests that happened with friends. But now that isn't the case. When I find things becoming competitive, resulting in this conservative, judgemental and withholding stance by my friends I can no longer just ignore it. If it's not fun, and I can't freely share my passions, then I'm no longer engaged. I initially interpreted this behavior as rejection by my friends. Now I think it's more that I'm irritating them because they don't "get" this new me. Or perhaps it's more an issue of how I react to these situations now that I am in the passion drummer's world. After letting go a bit, I'm realizing it wasn't rejection as much as it was simply an inability of these people to meet me half way precisely because they didn't dance to the beat of the passion drummer. It's a sad realization on the one hand, but it is comforting at the same time. I'm free now to seek out new friendships cultivated in the ways of the passion drummer, where there is little room for competition because it's about passion and fun, and not about status and reach goals first. So slowly my melancholy turns to anticipation for what is to come in this new season of friendship.

1 comment:

  1. I too have had these situations arise.
    I moved away from a status driven enviroment, to one filled with simple values and nature. Those who are status driven think they can buy passion. This does not come in a box, it is not an emotion you can purchase. This is what is so frusterating for your "friends?". You have so much more than they ever will. As a creator we experience love and joy....passion! Unfortunately we have to face the fact, to loose these associations, is no loss. It is another world, one that will not have the emotions and passion you have, As we get older, and have more experiences, we find that these emotions are the ones that are really important. We make beauty, we don"t buy it!!
    That is special. When you make beauty you see it, everyday, ie. the fallen leaves the colour of cars, they similes on faces, it surrounds us. Passion comes from the inside, and those that do not have it will always be jealous of those that do.